Ironically the title (Sylvie's Humble Opinion) has in fact a sarcastic undertone.
What a good first title.
Now you're asking me why I'm blogging. Well, I love to write. But I can't say I've ever seriously considered starting a blog before. Reason #1 being that I can't stay dedicated to anything; keeping a journal or new year's resolutions, taking multivitamins every morning or even emptying the damn dehumidifier when it's full. So, because I don't do it enough, I've decided writing a blog every couple of days would be a darn healthy* challenge. (And would make me feel better about myself)
Reason #2: I'm like "Who would want to read my boring bullshit anyway?" So that got me thinking; I must become interesting. So I will.
On that note, I will now go on a work-related rant: (Is that what interesting people do?)
I basically work for Atlantic Lottery. No, sorry, I work in a hospital gift shop. Sometimes I forget. Our customers are either patients, visitors or hospital workers coming in to feed their gambling addictions. Now, I had nothing against scratch tickets prior to this job, but seriously, these people need to find themselves a better hobby. Everyday I see people spending upsetting amounts of money on scratch and lottery tickets and getting back a couple of bucks. It's just depressing.
The shop itself is rather small and you can see just about everything there is by standing like, anywhere... BUT YET, unbelievably frequently, people actually ask me if we sell cards while standing next to our two very tall and obvious card racks. If only people would bother to try and find the answers themselves once in a while.
Lately, I've noticed a disturbing amount of people write in our cards before purchasing them. Being appalled by this rude act, I decided to start telling them that the next time, they should wait after having paid for the card before writing inside. This is a damn reasonable request, wouldn't you agree? The fact is that every customer I've told this to so far has always given me a confused look and asked me "Why?" (Seriously?) So I tell them "Because it belongs to us until you pay for it, and we would appreciate it if you didn't use our product prior to the transaction." Reasonable. You wouldn't go to Hallmark and start writing in a card that you haven't bought yet.
While most customers would understand the concept after having me explain it to them, I've encountered one exception so far.
He, his partner and their infant had been browsing in our gift shop. They picked out a card, came to borrow a pen from the cash then they all signed the card and kept browsing for quite some time before returning to purchase it. When they did, I politely explained that they should have purchased the card before using it.
This guy, lost. his. shit. "Are you serious? Why? Tell me why. Well, that's stupid. I'm gonna pay for it right now, see? Why does that matter? Are you the manager here? I want to speak to your manager right now. This is outrageous!"
The fact is that he tried to use his debit card to pay for it and we don't allow debit or credit for transactions under 5$. That pissed him off even more, but proved my point.
And I did start dialing my manager's number as he was yelling at me in front of a few scared costumers. What? Did he seriously expect my manager to agree with him? But at this point, his girlfriend/wife told him to calm down and they scurried off. (After having to get cash from an ATM of course)
Now you're like "Sylvie, you have a lame job."
But then I ask you "Do you get paid 11 dollars an hour to sit and do as you please between customers? Didn't think so." (Though if you answered yes to that, then get me a job where you work.)
I read about 0.3 books every shift, listen to music of my choice, snack, stare at a clock and play Solitaire on my iPod. It is a lame job and the customers are the dumbest shits around, but it suits my lazy nature. Anywhere you work in retail is going to be crawling with idiots, better choose wisely.
I will now conclude this entry with a scribble from work today and also one of my favorite scenes from the TV show 30 Rock.
"I am convinced that one of these days, my jaw will effectively unhinge itself from the yawning."
*The correct word here would be healthful, but I'm like "Fuck that."
You're the ShizNit.
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